Catholicly Correct speech ...
How to introduce your formerly 'gay' son and his friend when they arrive for a candlelight dinner party: "This is my same sex attracted son Sheridan, and his disinterested friend Tarquin."
. . .
The Candlelight Supper, Sheridan rings, and after asking for seventy pounds, the following is heard:
Hyacinth (to Sheridan): "Now you're not spending it on girls, are you, dear? You promised Mummy. We agreed not until after you've finished your education. [she listens] Oh, you and Tarquin aren't interested in girls. What a comfort that is to a mother's heart, dear."