How to pray when you don't know how.

Or simply can't.

Remember, live in the Presence of God.  Recollection is a prayer which helps us to pray always.

MEDITATION OF THE DAY

A Simple Way to Pray Always

After my liberation many people said to me: “Father, in prison you must have had a lot of time to pray.” It was not as simple as one might think. The Lord permitted me to experience all my weakness, my physical and mental fragility. Time passes slowly in prison, particularly in solitary confinement. Imagine a week, a month, two months of silence…. There were days when I was so worn out by exhaustion and illness that I could not manage to say a single prayer! This reminds me of a story.

There was an older man named Jim who would go to church every day at noon for just a few minutes, and then he would leave. The sacristan was very curious about Jim’s daily routine, and one day he stopped him to ask: “Why do you come here every day?” “I come to pray,” Jim answered.

“That’s impossible! What prayer can you say in two minutes?”

“I am an old, ignorant man. I pray to God in my own way.”

“But what do you say?”

“I say: ‘Jesus, here I am, it’s Jim.’ And then I leave.” After some years, Jim became ill and had to go to the hospital, where he was admitted to the ward for the poor. When it seemed that Jim was dying, a priest and a nurse, a religious sister, stood near his bed. The priest asked, “Jim, tell us how it is that from the day you came to this ward everything changed for the better? How is it that the patients have become happier, more content, and friendlier?”

“I don’t know. When I could walk around, I would try to visit everyone. I greeted them, talked a bit with them. When I couldn’t get out of bed I called everyone over to me to make them laugh, to make them happy. With Jim they are always happy!”

“But why are you happy?”

“Well aren’t you happy when you receive a visitor?” asked Jim.

“Of course, but we have never seen anyone come to visit you.”

“When I came here I asked you for two chairs. One was for you, Father, and one was reserved for my guest.” “But what guest?” the priest asked.

“I used to go to church to visit Jesus every day at noon. But when I couldn’t do that anymore, Jesus came here.”

“Jesus comes to visit you? What does he say?”

“He says: ‘Jim, here I am, it’s Jesus!’” Before dying, Jim smiled and gestured with his hand toward the chair next to his bed, as if inviting someone to sit down. He smiled for the last time and closed his eyes.

When my strength failed and I could not even pray, I repeated: “Jesus, here I am, it’s Francis.” Joy and consolation would come to me and I experienced Jesus ­responding: “Francis, here I am, it’s Jesus.”

Venerable Francis Xavier Nguyên Văn Thuân

Cardinal Nguyên Văn Thuân († 2002) was imprisoned by the Vietnamese government for thirteen years. [From Five Loaves & Two Fish, Tinvui Media, Tr. © 1997, Edizioni San Paolo, Pauline Books & Media/The Daughters of St. Paul, Boston, MA. All rights reserved. Used with permission.]

A warning from the Pope.

I'm against it.

I'm against a whole bunch of stuff.

That's all.

Life imitates art ... Fr. Z is the new Robert Langdon.

Z Map.

He's been connecting dots.

And they line up to a similar pattern as that found in Dan Brown's Angels and Demons - you know, the author of those books about the Illuminati who has pretty much been condemned by Catholics online as anti-Catholic?  Hmmmmm...

Illuminati Map.

For some time, as I hear about bizarre things going on in and around the Vatican City State, I’ve been trying to connect the dots.   This morning I connected literal dots just to see what a few of these strange things looked like, mapped out.

• There was a horrible drug fueled homosexual orgy at the Palazzo Sant’Uffizio some years back.  That’s in the very building where the CDF and the Pontifical Commission “Ecclesia Dei” are housed.  Where the Faith is defended and where Tradition is being fostered.  The CDF also handles the graviora delicta, abuse matters.  This is also very close to the a) place where Peter was crucified, b) the Synod Hall, c) the Casa Santa Marta (where Francis lives), d) the Basilica where Peter’s bones are.

• A ceremony was held in the Vatican Gardens near the Museums where a tree was planted and an imam recited a sutra from the Koran that was intended to claim territory for “Allah”.  That video was scrubbed and the whole thing buried.  I recently went to that spot and saw the tree.  There is no plaque for the event, though all the other commemorative trees have a plaque.

• A pagan ritual was held in the Vatican Gardens near the Grotto of Our Lady of Lourdes.  A statue of Pachamama was venerated in a ritual way.  A pagan idol was venerated, in violation of the 1st Commandment.  This idol was ubiquitous during the Amazon Synod as were black bowls used in the rite to invoke that demon.   I know at least one priest who went to that place and recited Ch. 3 of Title in the Roman Ritual to exorcise a place.

• Pagan symbols including many Pachamama idols with obscene dehumanizing photos were displayed in a church just up the main street extending to St. Peter’s Basilica, in Santa Maria in Traspontina.  There were regular ceremonies there to venerate the demonic idols over a period of a month.  An young Austrian man took some of the idols from this church and threw them into the Tiber River.

• During the closing Mass of the Amazon Synod, one of those black bowls with a plant with red flowers, associated with the cult of the demon Pachamama, was placed – at the order of Francis – on the very altar of Saint Peter’s Basilica directly over the place where the bones of St. Peter are located. - Wherein Fr. Z Rants.

Alert the media.  Get the presses rolling - this could be bigger than those National best sellers, Deciphering the Da Vinci Code and the Gargoyle Code!  Get Ron Howard on the phone!  No!  Get Barb Nicolosi and Act Up - get a screen play and make this film.  What?

Fr. Z just might be made a Monsignor for this one.

So. Viganò calls for the reconsecration of St. Peter’s Basilica?

Pachamama, a symbol of earth’s fertility for Andean cultures.

Yep.  Those are the words of Archbp. Carlo Maria Viganò.

Fr.Z links to the original story/interview from LifeSiteNews.  Methinks they protest too much - but who am I to judge?

I'm certainly not afraid.  As a fan and painter of Indigenous-Spanish-Colonial art, and since I have been influenced by Spanish mysticism and spirituality since my youth, as well as that introduced by missionaries in the Americas, I have great esteem for the indigenous elements documented in Roman Catholic iconography, much of which remain to this day.

The idea that a Pachamama image(s) was found displayed in Our Lady's Church in Rome, and carried along a Way of the Cross at St. Peter's, or was used in a tree planting ceremony in the Vatican gardens, hardly rises to the Abomination of Desolation level of apostasy.  St. JPII attended similar ceremonies in Assisi, kissed a Koran, among other actions, which always unsettled the settled.  My point is, to some extent these concerns are not new - the issue of inculturation and the fears of syncretism stretch back to Colonial times.  I will offer an example from Bolivia.

San Francisco, La paz

All photos for this post

are details of the 1700's facade.

The facade of the Basilica of San Francisco in the city of La Paz, Bolivia.

A plaque at the atrium of the San Francis church that is part of the market reads: “What began causing divisions, ended up uniting two cultures in a rich blend of cultures that marks the identity of this unique city.”

In LaPaz, Bolivia, in 1549, the Franciscan order built a church. It was rebuilt some 200 years later by indigenous people who had converted to Catholicism. In its baroque-styled facade, they carved in stone the head of a bull, a symbol of the colonizers, as well as Franciscan shields, and a bare-breasted goddess, who Mendoza says is Pachamama, a symbol of earth’s fertility for Andean cultures.

Anthropologists say that the indigenous would camouflage their beliefs under Catholic ones. That created a blend of Christian and ancestral rites, called religious syncretism. It is recognized by Bolivia’s constitution under the term “Andean cosmovision,” and it is widely practiced by many in the mostly indigenous South American country. - Source

Superstitious fears.

God bless the prelates and priests concerned about the confusion in the Church, but they need to stop stirring up fears of Satanism invading the sanctuary, and giving so much credence to powerless idols - who have mouths, but speak not, who are naked, but attract not.

As Pope Francis has pointed out since the beginning of his Pontificate, real idolatry exists in the world and is perpetrated by big business, politics, prosperity-gospel-preachers, and ideological colonization - by any entity well funded by their followers.  Entire nations, along with big business take part in infant sacrifice through legalized  abortion and imposed contraception, as well as human trafficking.  One ought not forget the role big pharma, fashion and pop-culture plays in the manipulation of gender-identity,  body-dysphoria - which is worse than any form of tribal scarification-mutilation and or tattooing to 'please the gods'.  The priests of Baal cut themselves to gain favor with their false gods.   Our generation is idolatrous to the extreme, we embrace these forms of pagan ritual in ordinary life.  Look how prevalent piercings and tattoos are even among devout Catholics. 

Just remember, Pachamama and many other pagan effigies hold places of honor on church facades and in the interiors of churches throughout Europe since Medieval times and earlier.

On April 23, 1758, The Basilica was officially consecrated - as it is.

Maybe someone might want to inform Vigano?

The Eighth Day

Eight days ago I wrote about dubious apparitions.

The same day I came down with flu symptoms, even though I got a flu shot.  This has been one of the worst I've had - I missed Mass twice, and finally managed to get into Urgent Care for diagnosis.  No pneumonia - but bronchitis.  The flu test was deemed a false negative because my symptoms contradicted the test.  Today I'm beginning to feel better.

Was I punished for my post?

Haha!  I don't believe it works that way.  What I do believe is that getting hit with a severe illness for a few days, completely interrupts your life.  It's a prelude to death, in a way.  The thought of possessions and material things seems like such a burden.  Even food is reduced to a necessity without enjoyment or satisfaction.  What I have spent my time on - ah - social media, reading, writing, getting worked up over all the fighting, political division, even in the Church, all of it is diminished in importance in contrast with eternal life - or eternal death.  In fact, it seems to me, eternal death is the continuation of the chaos and conflict we immerse ourselves in, enclosed, imprisoned by the materialism our possessions represent. 

I think purgatory may be a better analogy, since I am feeling better and I have more hope.  The fever and chills and aches - perhaps just a minute experience of the sufferings some of the mystics say souls in purgatory suffer.  The thought of unfinished projects and obligations, now unable to complete, as well as the needs of those who depend upon me, which I couldn't take care of when I was in bed, unable to do much, seemed to me a sort of purgative experience.  Sorry to be so dramatic, but illness seems to me to be a sort of 'correction of conscience'.  BTW, that's what the 'Warning' is supposed to accomplish.  I don't see that as a punishment.

Souls in Purgatory Supplicating the Madonna of Loreto

Guercino

A correction of conscience.

In a BBC interview Mikhail Gorbachev, the world is in colossal danger at this time.  Over the weekend, news from Akita surfaced, the angel who first appeared Sr. Sasagawa returned, calling for penance and prayer, in the style of Jonah, and in my opinion, a purposeful reference to the prophet's  urgent call to repentance at Nineveh.

The good thing to convey to everyone is, “Cover in ashes” (see Note 2) “and please pray the Penitential Rosary every day. You (Sr. Sasagawa) become like an child and every day please give sacrifice.” - Source

That gave me pause, but I don't think it should surprise anyone, or scare people ... sitting in ashes may be similar to having the flu and unable to eat.  To do penance, to become like a child, to pray the rosary in a spirit of penance and reparation, that is not a punishment. 

We know Gorbachev is right, and Sr. Sasagawa seems even more credible, as well.  We are in perilous times.  So it is good to pray for repentance and do penance - not just for ourselves, but all of those deceived and distracted by social media and the world.

To do penance:  Maybe to sit in the ashes of our material consumption and waste.  To fast from all forms of excessive consumption.

To become like a child:  Maybe to become humble.  To depend on the promises of Christ, rather than those of the world, the flesh and the devil.  To surrender ourselves entirely to the Holy Trinity through Our Lady, the Mother of Jesus.  To stop judging and condemning, and trying to be in control, to strive become simple, like the Infant Jesus.

To pray the penitential rosary in a spirit of penance and reparation:  Maybe to pray for authentic repentance while we pray for the conversion of sinners who have no one to pray for them   Rather than concern ourselves with who does what, pray in repentance.  The Publican never lifted his eyes to heaven, nor did he look about him to find someone worse than himself.  Repentance is not real when we point the blame on others, or call out their sins.  It lacks humility - and tit seems to me this is at the heart of the message given by Sr. Sasagawa's angel.

After the bomb - Hiroshima.

The Odd Thing About the Events at Garabandal...

Ezkioga

Striking similarities with Ezkioga

Those devoted to Our Lady of Garabandal, while awaiting the Warning, the Miracle, and then the Chastisement, maybe aren't as well acquainted with the apparitions at Ezkioga thirty years earlier.  I've written about it in the past, but I'd like to share something I came across on the apparent link between the two events.  I find it interesting that the events in Garabandal occurred a mere 30 years after the events of Ezkioga - with very similar messages. 

The alleged series of apparitions in 1931 took place not far from San Sebastian, the city in Northern Spain near Garabandal. The visionary was Ramona Olazábal and her visions began on the feast of Mt. Carmel, July 16, 1931 at Ezkioga, Spain. (The BVM was identified at Garabandal as Our Lady of Mt. Carmel.)  The visions became popular and attracted crowds, but it was said they became corrupted by anti-clericalist Freemasons and were subsequently politicized. The apparitions were 

later condemned.  

Ezkioga

I found the following account after Googling Garabandal and Ezkioga.

As I was reading about this apparition, a curious fact grabbed my attention:

"Soon phenomena spread to such an extent that there were at least 250 official seers and many more who had lesser experiences in dozens of villages, especially in the town of Ezkioga, where visionaries saw Mary as the Sorrowful Mother, took down her messages, fell into strange rigid trances, or, eyes bulging and rolled back, held up religious items to be blessed.

The visions spread from Ezkioga east, west, and south as far as Orgiva.

Most striking were the prophecies: the apparitions at Ezkioga predicted chastising calamities for mankind, including a world war and three days in which the earth would be plunged into a horrendous darkness. There would also be a "great miracle" that would be seen at Ezkioga but noted in the entire world.

Some said the "great miracle" would be the Virgin appearing with three angels with a half moon at her feet and an extraordinary light that would cover the local mountain. Walls would materialize and from all four sides the Virgin would be seen. Saint Michael would appear on a white horse. "The miracle will begin at a quarter to five in the afternoon and will end at eleven at night," said one account. "The walls will remain as a sign for what has to be done in this place."

One seer said she knew the date of a chastisement and would be allowed to tell people eight days in advance. "Between the chastisement and the miracle there will be little time," she said. "The Virgin has told me which day the chastisement will be and which day the miracle, and I have declared it in writing to my confessor in sealed letters that he keeps, and on the envelope is indicated the day he may open them....

The visions spread from Ezkioga east, west, and south as far as Orgiva. 

Most striking were the prophecies: the apparitions at Ezkioga predicted chastising calamities for mankind, including a world war and three days in which the earth would be plunged into a horrendous darkness. There would also be a "great miracle" that would be seen at Ezkioga but noted in the entire world. 

Some said the "great miracle" would be the Virgin appearing with three angels with a half moon at her feet and an extraordinary light that would cover the local mountain. Walls would materialize and from all four sides the Virgin would be seen. Saint Michael would appear on a white horse. "The miracle will begin at a quarter to five in the afternoon and will end at eleven at night," said one account. "The walls will remain as a sign for what has to be done in this place." 

One seer said she knew the date of a chastisement and would be allowed to tell people eight days in advance. "Between the chastisement and the miracle there will be little time," she said. "The Virgin has told me which day the chastisement will be and which day the miracle, and I have declared it in writing to my confessor in sealed letters that he keeps, and on the envelope is indicated the day he may open them.... http://www.spiritdaily.net/ezkioga.htm

Eight days in advance? Now that is exactly what the seer at Garabandal has said. The fact that these two apparitions are linked geographically and also by this curious fact should be cause for concern for those who automatically assume that Garabandal is genuine. The fact is that the prediction of a great supernatural event which would be announced 8 days in advance was made FIRST at Ezkioga in the 1930s. It turns out that Ezkioga would end up being condemned. In fact, the history of Ezkioga is downright disturbing:

"In 1933 the local bishop, Mugica of Vitoria, condemned the apparitions, banned books about them, and even threatened excommunication if seers disobeyed. In 1934 the Vatican backed him up with a declaration of its own. Church authorities concluded that the apparitions -- or at least a good number of them -- were without merit or even demonic.

It was a region that had seen outbreaks of witchcraft in the 17th century, when wizards were intensely active, casting spells, causing infertility, and denying God and the Virgin Mary, whom the spirits mimicked. The center for witches was in the mountain range of Amboto, where it was said that a deity known as "la Dama" (the lady), patron of witches, lived in caves. The devil was also said to appear as both a black male goat and a man. - Richard, Marian Apparitions

Ezkioga

 This leads me to doubt the authenticity of the alleged apparitions at both Garabandal and Medjugorje.  I wonder why people give so much credence to these things, which can be so easily corrupted by literal interpretation and speculation, as well as the evil spirit and men with an agenda to discredit the Church.

Garabandal

I visited there on my way to Santiago.

Crackpots online promoting Bayside.

Claiming the Blessed Virgin warned us.

How did I miss this? Crackpots online are associating the Synod with dire prophesies issued in the so-called Bayside apparitions - which are absolutely false, BTW.  No matter how promoters try to convince readers they have yet to be approved.  They are preposterous.

I came across the following from David Martin on Eponymous Flower blog:

"While the Marian apparitions of *Bayside still await formal ecclesiastical sanction, it behooves Christian patriots to reflect on the Bayside message since it prophesied everything we see happening in the Church at this time."

Martin appears to be a promoter of Bayside.

Bayside was condemned by the local ordinary at the time:

"The Bayside apparition (“Our Lady of the Roses”) is totally and completely false. A Catholic should ignore it and have nothing to do with it or its literature. The supposed seer, the late Veronica Leuken, issued bizarre revelations and false prophesies that have not come to pass, such as the claim that “the Warning spoken of through the ages will occur in the year 1997.” This Warning—not to be confused with the Three Days of Darkness or the Chastisement that some speak of—”is the worldwide cataclysm predicted by little Jacinta Marto, the youngest of the three child-seers at Fatima.”

She also said Mary told her that test-tube babies do not have souls, a philosophically and theologically impossible proposition, since all living human beings have souls.

Furthermore, the late bishop of the diocese in which Veronica Leuken resided (Bishop John Mugavero) had repeatedly condemned the apparition as a fake. The condemnation remains in force. The full text of Mugavero’s 1986 declaration concerning the “Bayside Movement” can be found at www.ewtn.com." - Catholic Answers

I can't believe people would follow some crackpot, private revelation and use the 'messages' to reject the Pope. Bayside is a cult. Jacinta Marto didn't predict a worldwide cataclysm - Veronica claimed she did - but these fake messages are not part of the actual Fatima message. Bayside is absolutely ridiculous. What follows is an excerpt from the wacky messages concerning Jacinta:

"Jacinta of Fatima...
Veronica — Oh! Now by Our Lady there’s a great...oh, there’s a great light. And there...oh, oh, it’s Jacinta! I know her... now, and she’s pointing over to the trees. And she’s holding up one finger. She says:
Jacinta — "All has come true as I gave to you from Our Lady of the Roses, but Our Father still plans to bring you back. Everyone has so much in many things upon your earth, but yet they all look so unhappy. They are rich, and yet they are so poor.
"I have come to tell you of the poor Holy Father. I cried much for him. We love him, but man will destroy him now.
"Many little children are being destroyed on your earth. Our Father sends the angels to you, but you send them back to Us. It is only because Satan does not want a large army upon earth of Our Father’s children. Those that will be left will bring much grief and misery to the world, for they will be taken by Satan and used.
"I gave you the picture. I wrote on your picture. I did not know how to write much on earth, but I wrote. Our Father showed me how to write. Won’t you give everyone my picture? I want them to remember what I tried to tell them."
Veronica — Our Lady has now come over to Jacinta, and She’s placed Her arm about her. And there’s a little boy standing next to Jacinta. I know he’s Francisco. He has his hat off now. He’s standing with his hat, like a long cap, in his hand. And he’s smiling. (2-1-73)"

The 20th century is filled with stories of apparitions and private revelations, most are unapproved, many condemned, and those which are approved are usually simply designated as 'worthy of belief'.  Fatima is the exception, it's message archived by the Holy See, the official interpretation communicated there.

Several unknown, yet at the time popular sites of alleged apparitions, occurred after the Fatima events.  I like to remind readers of an alleged series of apparitions in 1931 which took place not far from San Sebastian, a city in Northern Spain near Garabandal. The visionary was Ramona Olazábal and her visions began on the feast of Mt. Carmel, July 16, 1931 at Ezkioga, Spain. The visions became popular and attracted crowds, but it was said they became corrupted by opportunistic Freemasons and were subsequently politicized. The apparitions were later condemned. You can read about them here.

The popular support of Ezkioga was also linked to anti-clerical factions, used in an effort to discredit the bishops. Not unlike today when we see the bishops and even the pope opposed in response to restrictions imposed upon claims of apparitions or private revelations.  Although now, we see Bayside and Garabandal used to discredit the Pope and recent Synods.  Catholics beware.

It seems some people are unhappy with the Pope.

Again.

Yesterday the Holy Father apologized for the theft and disposal in the Tiber of three Pachamama images, which had been on display in a Church not far from St. Peter's Square. 

According to a video of his remarks that made the rounds on social media, Francis said the statues had been displayed “without idolatry” in the Church of Santa Maria in Traspontina, located about halfway down the broad Via della Conciliazione that leads away from St. Peter’s Square.

Francis also added that Roman law enforcement officials have recovered the discarded statues and are holding them for the moment at a police station.

Friday’s apology caps what has been a month-long drama surrounding the statues, which first made an appearance during an Oct. 4 indigenous prayer service staged in the Vatican gardens in the presence of the pope. - Crux

People are attacking and mocking the Pope for this.  Many photo shopped memes have surfaced online, insulting the Holy Father and indigenous people.

You are always going to disappoint someone...

Yesterday I went to the doctor.

I posted about how fun it was on FB and included some of the more frustrating details for my friend. I forget how very sensitive FB friends can be. What follows is my post with an exchange between meself and me friend...

It was interesting. While involved with medical professionals this past week, many questions arose and for a couple of questions I simply responded, "I'm Catholic." Even when my Dr. had to ask about depression, one of the questions was about feeling suicidal and I said, "Nope. I'm Catholic." He knows me BTW - I've seen the same doctor since 1995.

Friend's comment:  Being Catholic doesn't make us immune from suicidal ideation and attempts. It's a devastating reality of the disease of mental illness. I've been there and I am convinced Jesus has so much mercy in this area because a "normal/healthy" person doesn't go down this path. It is part of the disease.

My response: It works for me. "You would play upon me. You would seem to know my stops. You would pluck out the heart of my mystery?" Listen Gina, it also puts an end to questions I consider a matter of conscience and for me alone to divulge to whom I choose and when I may or may not be seeking treatment for any sort of mental health issue. These questions are routine for adults my age - or so I'm told - I expect to comply with some Medicare or insurance regulation. It's just my personal response to a banal check list for my Internist Dr. who incidentally, couldn't give me a cortisone shot for severe arthritic knee pain before sending me to an Orthopedist, yet he can give me a script for off-label use of a psychotropic drug. 

Yesterday I went to the Dr. with real ailments, only to be referred to a specialist - it makes me crazy. 

Of course I know Catholics have episodes of suicidal ideation and attempt suicide. St Therese did. Nuns in India killed themselves. I know there is mercy for suicides and so on. It's a very human, rather common disease right now. Telling the Dr. 'I'm Catholic' was my 'sick' humor response - and he gets it. He's often told me in the past, being Catholic was my main problem - although I hope I convinced him it isn't being Catholic that poses a problem, it's the Inquisitors, the rigid, ideological Catholics who try to tell others how to live their lives. As the Pope said, 'There are many schools of rigidity in the Church - often masking serious problems, hiding something else.' Each of us can maybe ponder that in our heart.