So here's the deal..
Write whatever comes to your mind about yourself.
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That's it.
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It is called: Voices from the couch. (As in psychiatrist's couch - no, I've never been on one.)
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Start.
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1) So here's the deal, I feel burnt out on this blogging thing - as my mother would say, "I'm so sick of this blogging BS!" I don't mean to complain - and you see, that is just it - I have to be nice, and everyone knows snarky is more fun. Well, not really, which is why I stopped reading some blogs. Truth is, I don't know what to write about and it is spring and I have other projects - work on the house, in the yard, etc.. And I've wasted over two years blogging. That is pathetic. Do people realize we will be judged on every word we say - which includes writing?
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2) And face it - some days you just want to rip on people. But that is a mistake because deep down everyone is nice, good, what have you. If they are bitchy and mean it is because they hurt inside - something is off - so why go nuts on them? And if they are in error, they will come to realize it eventually, that's what hell is for.
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3) I love comedy - and I so want to share it with all of you - but so few want to see my favorite sitcom episodes from Youtube because everyone is so darn religious - which is good - don't get me wrong - but I'm older and a lot of stuff just doesn't bother me the way it does other younger men who get turned on by just about anything that walks. (Oh! Oh! That may be another reason they get so angry about stuff!)
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4) Sometimes when I'm at the store I want to pretend I'm insane and talk to strangers really loud with a big smiley face - and then laugh really hard. And like when I'm at the vegetable section - I want to rummage madly through the heads of lettuce laughing and singing and talking really loud, and then walk away totally serious, quiet and reserved. Wouldn't that be funny? And then, and then, I want to like dance by myself down the isle, like in Thriller. I don't though.
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5) Sometimes people are rude in the grocery store. I encounter many snobs there. No, I'm not intimidated - but I wish they weren't so snobby - for themselves - not me. I think it is fun to watch and listen to snobs - I used to be a big snob. Sometimes, if someone I thought was nobody said hello to me I'd turn and look the other way. Not so much because I thought I was better - altho I was cooler - but because I was afraid others would see me being nice to them. That was so mean.
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6) Which is why snobby people should avoid snobbism - someday they will realize they are big losers anyway. This is what sickness, getting old and ugly, depression, losing a job, or a house, or a spouse, and all the other bad things that happen to good people are for - to help us realize we are all really a bunch of losers. If these things don't work, then hell pretty much takes care of any miscommunication.
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My parents didn't like me -so sometimes when they got really angry with me, they would tell me they were going to disown me. In their mind, I'd be out of the will. We were poor! Wasn't that lame? So you see, snobs do not have to have money, position, status, or anything else to be snobs.
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Time is up! This session is over.
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(I tag anyone who likes stupid, crazy, silly humor - there are a few nut-jobs out there I'd like to hear from - so if you really do this - leave a comment so I can read what you wrote. Thanks Father.)
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