Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Born this way?

Gay and Catholic.

Many Catholics are convinced people with homosexual attraction are indeed born gay.  The Church doesn't really teach that - although people in the Church do. 

I'm coming across a lot of born this way talk from gay Catholics.  There is a point - a period of time in one's life when that notion seems to be absolutely true.  Guided by our emotions and passions, we think we are what we feel.  we think our attractions reveal what we are, that our sensate experiences - as in sensuality - define us.  I believe it much more complex than that.  I came across a fine article written by a man who refuses to be defined by his same sex attraction.  I know many people will disagree with what the author has to say, but I'm convinced his story is very important for Catholics to take into consideration.  Please keep an open mind. 
I am Not Gay . . . I am David      
Are people born "gay" or do they choose to be gay?

The answer to both questions is no—although in many passionate debates generated by this topic, we are quick to dismiss objectivity. In reality, these questions provide a smoke screen to a much bigger problem that is pervasive in our society, in religious circles, politics, and clinical settings. The problem I speak of is the idea that homosexuality is an identity.

I used to believe I was a "gay" person. I had been attracted to the same gender for as long as I could remember. Because this attraction was present from early on in my life, without my conscious choice, I concluded that I must have been born this way. After all, that’s a logical conclusion . . . right?

The attraction I had to the same gender when I was a little boy was normal and similar to what many boys experience. Boys look for heroes, role models who they respect and want to emulate. For me, the attraction to men started out with normal admiration but then began to take some dysfunctional turns. As a child, I was often made fun of and told by my peers that I wasn’t like them. This made me question what the difference between us was. At this point, shades of covetousness characterized my admiration. I secretly wondered, "If I looked like so-and-so, would I be accepted?"

In puberty, this attraction or admiration became eroticized. The derogative homosexual label was given to me by my peers, and I yielded to their accusations because I truly did have a sexualized same-sex attraction. Eventually, I embraced this label and called myself "gay."

Although I didn’t freely choose same-sex attractions, I did willfully choose to act upon them. My decision to sin brought me intense pain, loneliness, and—worst of all—separation from God. The Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith explained this reality in a statement that observed, "As in every moral disorder, homosexual activity prevents one’s own fulfillment and happiness by acting contrary to the creative wisdom of God. The Church, in rejecting erroneous opinions regarding homosexuality, does not limit personal freedom and dignity realistically and authentically understood."[1]

Eventually, in my brokenness, I responded to the Lord’s loving call to forgiveness and healing. He has brought me through the valley of shame and out of the darkness of my past and shined His light of truth upon the many lies I believed about myself—especially the one that claimed that I was a "gay" person. - Continue reading...
Please continue reading the entire article before commenting.  


  1. Kind of the same topic: Should St. Mary of Egypt had been arrested? http://www.orthodoxbiz.com/20091031436/orthodoxy/should-st.-mary-of-egypt-have-done-jail-time.html

  2. absolutely beautiful and spot on!

  3. God created the world in six days, ex nihilo and in toto.

    There was no homosexuality, lesbianism, and so on.

    Sin entered the world.

    These things are the result od Sin, not God's creation.


  4. [I'm not actually commenting, because I don't have time to read the whole article as requested. I'm simply wondering aloud how many people will sound off without having read it?]

  5. Thom - looks like very few people intend to comment.

  6. Thanks for posting this article. Makes me wish that every seminary rector and those responsible for religious formation would also read it and believe. I could say more, but prudence tells me to end here.

  7. Here is more proof they are not born that way:


    Mommy Dearest!



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