Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Something Eve Tushnet said...

St. Elizabeth of Hungary: Great Act of Renunciation.
St. Elizabeth is Eve Tushnet's patron saint.

The America interview.

Eve Tushnet discusses her book, Gay and Catholic: Accepting my Sexuality, Finding Community, Living My Faith.  The book is due out October 20.  In the interview with Sean Salai, S.J., Eve discusses in detail the content.  It's a very good interview, and if you ever had misgivings about Eve Tushnet and her POV on gay and Catholic, the interview helps you understand where she is coming from.

Not to worry.

I told that to a friend I ran into recently - I didn't tell him not to worry, but I told him I'm not so concerned about gay and Catholic issues any longer.  I explained that it seems things are coming together - it's 'out'  in the open now.  It's part of our reality.  In fact, gay seems to me to be more of a problem for straight people than it is for gay, ssa, the homosexually inclined or any category of LGBTQ.

As a Catholic, I favor Courage Apostolate and the way of life/sanctity promoted by the organization.  Courage has done a great job updating its website and offers real life narratives from members on how the organization has helped them live chaste and celibate lives in accord with Catholic teaching.  If someone is not near a group, or maybe not willing to be part of one - the site offers help and support, as well as resources to integrate one's spirituality.

A different perspective.

Courage may not appeal to everyone however, so there are other groups/movements out there.  It appears Eve Tushnet discusses these alternatives in her book.  I've written about some of them, questioning some of the literature, and so on.  I'm not as critical as I once was, but neither am I as interested as I once was.  It's not an important issue in my life.  Am I 'over it'?  I don't know.  It's just not an issue for me at this point in my life.  I can't worry about the 'terms' either.  "You say potato I say vodka" as Karen Walker would say.  But truly, some say gay, some say queer, others say ssa.  Fine.  Truth be told the term I think that has been hijacked is 'spiritual friendship'.  It's a religious term used by gay Catholics to denote chaste, loving friendship - but it is now misinterpreted by nuvo neo-Catholic apologists with websites to equate spiritual friendship with 'gay' or 'new homophiles'.   Thus every discussion in com-boxes tend to become inquisitions regarding orthodoxy and fidelity to Catholic teaching.  It gets to be a waste of time.

Ms. Tushnet said something that more or less jives with my POV and experience, and what I was kind of saying to the friend I ran into at the grocery store:
"One of the things that I find really heartening is just how many people there are who are coming out and accepting themselves, but also staying within the Catholic Church or other churches that hold to a traditional understanding of sexuality. That’s so different from when I became Catholic. Everything is so different and so much more open, in the sense of a camaraderie that was not there at all when I became Catholic, and it’s really great." - Eve Tushnet, America
Read the entire interview, and if interested, get the book when it comes out.  I think many people will be helped.  Eve Tushnet impresses me as faithful and Catholic.

Over the years a lot of people have left the Church.  Many still do, but as the parable of the wedding banquet tells us - the Lord wants his Church full.  To be in the Church is the right place - if one is improperly dressed (formed) that can be corrected.  It is God who calls.


  1. I want to be more understanding towards people who struggle with SSA. I want to pray for them and to hope that like the rest of us, they can accept the Lord in their life and all the Church teaches about living in truth and in communion with the Lord and with each other.

    Please pray for a cousin, T, who "came out about five years ago" but is still unhappy (at least it sounds that way). Every time we have a family get together, he gets drunk and cries on someone's shoulder about his "being gay. He repeats himself over and over, "oh, did you know I'm gay?" and just did so about one week ago and then he starts crying. He left the Church a while back so I do not know what he or if he believes anymore.

    Anyway, his struggle (and many like him) must be more difficult than I can imagine.

    Thanks Terry for your thoughts.

    Let's keep praying for each other.

    1. To be sure - I will pray for T too. I bet he still believes.

    2. I hope so...your prayers are much appreciated and I thank you. ^^

  2. Yaya,

    I don't mean to be an alarmist but he needs your prayers and he may need some kind of help..I am not sure how old he is but are you sure he is not thinking of something much darker then just "woe is me?" I am not putting you or your family or beliefs down, but he might just be self hating because of his sexuality. Because he doesn't go to Mass doesn't mean he doesn't feel a pull towards it, and it doesn't wipe away how many years of that being drilled into his head. The first thing some gay people do is reject their faith and or their family in a stand against how they were brought up to believe, "this was b.s. and I am loud and proud," but deep down those thoughts are still there, and they are left without a family or a faith. Just be there for him as a person and a family member and if the gay stuff makes you uncomfortable that's okay, tell him that, and say, "Let's talk about YOU, how are YOU doing?" That way you focus on him and don't have to act like you are approving or disapproving the gay thing, just that you love him.

    Sorry, dont mean to lecture. Prayers are with him.

    1. Good advice. Thanks Mack.

    2. I appreciate your words, MM. I have not spoken to him in a while as he distanced himself from me. (we used to be close). I do remember telling him I loved him no matter what and I did my best not to judge him but well, I hope to be able to talk next time I see him. It seems I make him uncomfortable since I did not come out and totally support his coming out. I just found it difficult to do.

      I do not know what he thinks but I do sense his unhappiness and I do hope he has not forsaken God. I am aware he may be searching and is struggling and I can only hope he finds his way back to God, where true happiness is to be found.

      Last thing I want is to pass judgement but I must be true to myself too.

    3. Very true Yaya..you have to be you. You let him know you love him sometimes that is all we can do. His Guardian Angel has him in his sights.


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