Monday, January 05, 2009

Mrs. Rabitowitz

A surprising story.
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Before going out to remove snow this afternoon, I put out more food for Mrs. Rabbit. I don't know if I mentioned this, but she sits only a few yards away from the little table I feed her at while I cover the top with food. I always make sure some of it falls on the ground for the mice and the voles. The table is actually an upside-down plastic litter-box that has never been used. It suits her perfectly as she sits on her haunches and feeds herself like a little person seated at a dining table.
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Anyway, as I was putting out the trail mix and baguette crumbs, I heard a little voice say quietly, "Thank you. The food has been especially delicious this winter."
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I looked up, quite surprised to see the rabbit speaking, having moved closer to me, less than a foot away I'd say. "You're quite welcome... err... Mrs. Rabbit." I answered.
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She giggled slightly and proceeded to inform me that her name was Mrs. Rabitowitz. I asked if she was Polish or Jewish and she explained that her heritage was indeed Jewish, but she couldn't be certain about the Polish part. "You look surprised Mr. Nelson, but most rabbits are of Jewish ancestry, although we don't go to temple. That explains why we are often depicted in art bringing eggs to children at Easter. The Catholics are all at Church and we deliver the eggs and candy for their celebrations."
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"Why of course!" I exclaimed, "that makes perfect sense. I just never heard that explanation before."
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"Oh sure, few people know about these things now days," she remarked, tasting a raisin. "For instance, did you realize most dogs are Gentiles, as are cats - although some breeds of cats may be Jewish, especially the Asian cats."
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"Oh..." I muttered distracted by the thought of pets having a particular nationality other than breed, or even a specific religious heritage. "Well I s'pose that would explain the German Shepherds who worked in the concentration camps." I said quietly.
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Mrs. Rabitowitz looked at me somewhat sadly, gave me a slight smile and said, "Adieu Mr. Nelson, and thank you again for such delicious food." And then she hopped away, into the hedge.
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I then went out front and finished removing snow before I drove to the store for more food.
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The End

7 comments:

  1. You're either an amazing storyteller, or the ridiculous winters in Minnesota have driven you to heavy drug use. Either way, I absolutely loved that. Thank you.

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  2. Thanks Thom - I wish it was drugs.

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  3. Anonymous7:10 PM

    as my daughter will say a few times when I speak aloud ... "wow, that was random!"

    ... yet, enjoyable ...

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  4. That really is a fantastic story. Lewis Carroll could have taken a tip or two from you:0)

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  5. What a nice story to read while sitting down to drink a cup of the Tazo tea that Auntie A sent me!

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  6. Anonymous1:21 PM

    Another great story for a illustrated book... I'm telling you, there is a market for this. This is one of niches that you fill beautifully. The world needs a modern Potter...

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