Some days.
.
Some days the memories of childhood sweep over me in a tsunami of pain and ignominy, with such overwhelming force, I can think of little else. After many years, I have learned to abandon myself in these circumstances. In doing so, I have come to realize how disabling the pain can be... like being crucified without nails.
.
I say that because I used to run from the pain. I ran into all sorts of vices trying to convince myself it never happened, and I always ended up proving it did... and proving that I was what they said I was. Although, in an odd way, my sin allowed me to forgive them.
.
Nevertheless it is still like being crucified - without nails; one is free to run - but it never goes away.
