Thursday, June 21, 2012

Hits and Stats



It's not you - it's ME!

Several of my online friends** have noticed they aren't getting the hits they are accustomed to.  It's summer sillies.  Who wants to be reading blogs when they are so busy tweeting from their vacation and happy spots?

Yet they will complain when everyone else seems to be getting traffic.  Or complain about blogomerates.  Or just complain.  I do it too - but I have Attention Deficit Disorder and don't remember.  Anyway - we all claim not to be a slave to our stitemeters, stats page, and number of comments we get in our comboxes - or the linky-links on news portals and other sites.  And yet when New Advent, ThePulpit, Patheos, Vox Nova, Fr. Z, Spirit Daily, Washington Post, and other 'celebrity' sites link to us we pee all over ourselves and think, "OMG!  I am the greatest evangelist since Fr. Crappie!" 

And then... and then... when you don't get picked up by those revenue producing blogomerates, and you realize you're not so hot and never going to make it big, you then decide you're gonna quit blogging.  I've been doing that ever since I started blogging.*

Hahahahahaahahaaaaaa!  You're insane and addicted to seeking fame and millions of online friends - you've become Stepford-Octomoms and filthy internet whores.  (The internet is the whore of Babylon you know.  Did you know calling someone 'baby' pays homage to that Whore?  What?)

Hahahahahahahahahaaaahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!  Insane laughter.  Lighten up.

Just blog if you want to say something - but say something original.  And stop looking for affirmation and praise from people you don't know.  The people who drop you are people who were never really your friends in the first place.

*The big difference between you and me is I never take down the blog, or continually start up a new one after I decided not to blog any longer.   When I decide to stop blogging - I get more honest - no concern about winning friends or influencing people.  There's a good lesson there.  Advertising, donate buttons, links to news portals, followers app, friend connect - it's hard to be honest when you are juggling all that crap.  It's hard to stay offline and get a life when you are trying to up your stats or make money on your thoughts you lifted from another source.

**Yes my friends, you inspire me. 

This post is so NOT about you!  Listen to this:  I won't be breakin' your heart!  (Well, not you.  Kidding!  Just kidding!  What?)

15 comments:

  1. " Filthy internet whores " - you talking about me hon?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ABSOLUTELY NOT! I'm talking like Beverly Sutphin from "Serial Mom". It's not directed at anyone except myself - and maybe the people at _____________.

      What?

      I'm joking!

      Delete
  2. i thought about blogging a few times but decided against it for that very reason: i have nothing new or original to say, so why bother.

    besides, you're a more entertaining train wreck.

    what?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think Carly Simon covered this topic "You're so vain, I bet you think this post is about you, don't you?"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think i should maybe remove it because people will get their feelings hurt and I never want to do that.

      What if Mrs. Puddlesworth reads it?

      Delete
    2. Mrs. Puddlesworth is far to charitable to think it's directed at her.

      Delete
  4. this post is most certainly about me. i will consider myself duly chastised.

    ReplyDelete
  5. is it bad if at least part of the reason why i commented is in the hopes that you'll click through to my site? what if it's the main reason?

    this is why i have no friends in real life.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I rather like interesting train wrecks. Terry, you're very entertaining. You make me laugh. Maybe you should have a "Guest Post" once a week.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm a slave to my site meter.

    When I get down to zero live visitors a day, or close to it, I put up another post to increase visitors.

    It's a never ending battle, but my goal is too try to have more real live viewers than computer crawlers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My goal is to become as unpopular as possible.

      Delete
  8. Oh sorry, were you saying something Mr. Button?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha! I didn't say anything.

      Delete
  9. The greatest round of insane laughter I've ever read on a blog. Link back plzkthx! HAAAAhahhahahahaHAAAHAAAAAA HAAAAAAA HAAAAAHAHAHAHA

    Twitterers have all the fun. Come join us. It's not addicting like that old fashioned blogging, really. It's just a little message. Nothing you can't control. #ItDoesntControlYourLife Wasn't it strange when Twitter was down for a couple hours yesterday? In a bad way?

    ReplyDelete


Please comment with charity and avoid ad hominem attacks. I exercise the right to delete comments I find inappropriate. Be sure and double check if your comment posted after you do the verification deal - sometimes it doesn't print if you made an error.