Saturday, June 18, 2011

Crazy Stuff Dad's Say - an idea I got from Jim Anderson's son.



On the light side.
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Larry did a post for Father's Day titled Crazy Stuff Dad's Say.  It's a fun read.  Inspired by Larry, I decided to list some of the crazy things my dad used to say.
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If Larry comes from a "Father Knows Best" style home, I come from a ...  err ... Charlie Sheen's house.
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Printable stuff my dad said.
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"Why you little son of a bitch!"
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"Shut up or I'll shut you up for good!"
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"You talk like you have a paper ass!"
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"Your ass sucks buttermilk!"
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"Blow it out your ass!"
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"You wouldn't make a pimple on a priest's ass!"
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"You wouldn't make a pimple on an artist's ass!"
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"You're no damn good!"
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"I love you with all my heart and soul."
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"I'd cut off my right arm for you!"
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Yelling out the door after me when I left home for good:  "Get the hell outta here and don't come back you..."
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So anyway dads, love your kids, stay close to your sons, train them well - with love and esteem and basic support - like food and clothing and shelter.  Try to stay out of jail.  Don't get drunk, don't swear and curse, don't commit crimes, don't lie, don't cheat, don't molest, don't terrorize.  Be a man - a man of God preferably.
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My dad finally embraced Catholicism and died a happy death about 20 years ago.  Praise God!
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Photo:  Mums and dadums after the Lawrence Welk Show on Saturday night.

14 comments:

  1. ((((((((((Hugs))))))))))

    I have never taken my now-departed father's awesomeness for granted, and this makes me ache for those who didn't have that.

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  2. My Dad has some colorful expressions. One of my favorites is, "Talking to some people is like writing a note and putting it down a prairie dog hole!"
    Or, about church-lady desserts with lots of Cool-Whip, "They're like running against the wind with a funnel in your mouth!"
    Or "old heifer" is code for b**ch

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  3. LOL! We love you, Terry.

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  4. "...My dad finally embraced Catholicism and died a happy death about 20 years ago. Praise God!..."

    He got to the fulfillment of the promises of Christ because you helped him bear his cross through his torment of you.

    God gave him the graces he needed because of what was truly in your heart on behalf of your daddy.

    You are a good soul, Mr. Nelson.

    Who really wants a father that is a paragon of Christian virtue?

    "Lord, don't you love me, your child? Where are my trials and tribulations?'

    Praise God in your days and nights of darkness of the soul.

    *

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  5. Keep praying for me, Ter.

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  6. "The night is friend of no one".
    ???
    His mother, who was a German immigrant, used to say that to him before he went out on a date, and he passed on the tradition by saying it to us as well.

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  7. Out of the darkness of that imperfect childhood came someone with a heart to lay the shadow of Christ's cross over so many lives...God Bless you Terri

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  8. Anonymous10:38 PM

    "Why you little son of a bitch!"

    LOL.

    Sorry, couldn't help but chuckle at that one.

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  9. Anonymous - I'm fond of that one too. LOL!

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  10. He sounds a bit like Homer Simpson to me and you remind me of Bart now and again heehee!

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  11. Anonymous11:10 AM

    And one of my favorite paternal sayings: Stop crying or I will give you something to cry about!

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  13. "The Immortal race between man and frog" - intoned while paddling a canoe with outrigger to retrieve a bait frog that had jumped ship.

    "I would date Racquel Welch and any man who says he wouldn't is a liar"
    _said in front of my mother who looked like she had been hit with a club.

    "What kind of an idiot are you?"

    " Use your head for something besides a hat rack"

    "You don't need God. Just use your brain."

    Dad was unusual. I don't know if he had a conversion before death. If he did, it was in his final moments because he was defiant right up to the end. I pray for him and hope with all my heart that he said "yes" to the Lord while he still had time.

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