Thursday, September 15, 2011

Afraid to leave the house...

It can't be dismissed as just a phobia anymore.
At first I thought the story was a joke: "Afraid to leave the house because of the gays."  The woman who wrote it lives in Massachusetts after all - no one in Massachusetts could be so elitist or snobby - could they?  It is such a liberal PC state after all - everyone is well educated, free to be whoever they want to be.  After reading the story I realized the author is indeed an intelligent, well educated, and very normal young woman.  A mother and a housewife.  Her  'afraid to leave the house' statement - perhaps a bit of hyperbole intended, actually spoke to much deeper issues.  The gay couple with their son at a playground wasn't the only cultural issue this woman was addressing.
The same people who say I shouldn't impose my morality on them, are imposing immorality on me and my children to the point that I literally have a hard time even leaving my home anymore to do something as simple as visit the park. And this is freedom?
I am a Catholic stay-at-home mother of seven, and I live in the state of Massachusetts where "gay marriage" has been legal for seven years and it's just one aspect of the larger secular agenda. Because we have so many little children, it takes a phenomenal effort to go anywhere. We have only filled our truck with gasoline twice this entire summer vacation. We go to Mass and we go two miles up the road to a small outdoor swimming pool. That's pretty much it.
I find myself unable to even leave the house anymore without worrying about what in tarnation we are going to encounter. We are responsible citizens. We live by the rules, we pay our taxes, we take care of our things. I'm supposed to be able to influence what goes on in my community, and as a voter I do exercise that right. But I'm outnumbered. I can't even go to normal places without having to sit silently and tolerate immorality. We all know what would happen if I asked two men or two women to stop displaying, right in front of me and my children, that they live in sodomy.
So now I go on a rant.

Our taxes are being used to fund contraception, abortion and IVF already. That offends me in ways that are inexpressible. I read last December in the Wall Street Journal how two men near us are raising two assembled daughters after announcing to the world how they killed two other siblings in surrogate mothers in India. Let me guess? I shouldn't offend them though, right? And what's next at the park? A needle exchange drop-box for heroin users? No joke. These things are not isolated, it is all the same issue at a fundamental level. We're being pushed to accept immorality and it's not just on TV and in Washington D.C. It's right in front of us too. - Finish reading: Can't even go to the park.
I'll let you finish reading Mrs. Trasancos' piece.  Sadly, shamefully and offensively - yet not unexpectedly, members of the LGBT community attacked her for voicing her opinion and frustrations on her personal web-log.  It demonstrates to me that the reality everyone is in denial about is that immorality is indeed a source of suffering for good people, normal people, traditional people - whatever you want to label them.  It is a normal spiritual experience.  In the biblical account of Sodom, God recognized the suffering of Lot, living amidst similar immorality and decadence - and it wasn't limited to homosexuality.  Like it or not, divorce, contraception, abortion, gay marriage, and general immorality concerning war and the inequities of economics, along with all sorts of lawlessness, has become acceptable in our society - and the ‘freedom’ to do such things is more or less imposed upon citizens to accept it or be castigated, reviled, condemned, and even sued.  Justice demands an outcry against it.
It's all around us.
The other day I was in the drug store - Walgreen's - and at the register were the tabloids, right at the level of children’s faces, along with other magazines with provocative covers - amongst them there was the Cosmo cover promoting a story about 25 naughty things you can do in bed - or something like that.   Elsewhere there were condoms for sale - right in front of kid's faces.  That evening, I noticed that during the news hour on TV they advertise hormone treatments for women to raise their sex drive - the woman in the ad says, "Now I drive my husband crazy asking for sex all of the time!"  I'll bet he'd be okay however if he buys the erectile dysfunction products advertised during the same time slot.
Of course, gays are not only at the pool or in the playgrounds with their kids these days, they are all over TV - Dancing With the Stars will feature two - talk about confusing the kids - it's a family show after all, although it's always been a good place to watch soft-porn all these seasons. Ellen is on in the afternoon - just in time for the kids as they arrive home for school, and then there is Glee for the High School Musical set.  But I guess it's all okay because the kids are taught about how normal it is to be gay in school now. 

Immorality restricts the common good.
Needless to say, good parents won't allow their kids to watch TV or listen to bad music or hang out.   Stacy Trasancos seems to be a good mom and doing her best to shelter her children, therefore I'm sure her kids won't watch or see anything bad on TV or in the drugstore.  Although Stacy's freedoms are curtailed by all of this vigilance.  Though creating a genuinely safe environment is difficult to accomplish, she most likely will be able to raise her kids morally and religiously. But it's going to be difficult and I’m afraid it may get worse. In the meantime comedy writers will have a field day with people who oppose what is really happening in society, making fun of them as Posh People and bigots and elitists - when all they are really trying to do is raise good kids.  Yep - at first I thought the story was nuts and should be a segment on Saturday Night Live.  Well, I still do a little bit - it reminded me of the Posh People episode from Catherine Tate - but then I realized it isn't funny in real life.  Protecting children isn't elitist - but do they have to live like Amish people to do so?  To be sure, families need our support and prayers.

Oh - and just think of all the other kids raised in poverty, in broken homes, without any moral foundation or support - what is to be done for them?  Unprotected from the onslaught of immorality - many are raised without any guidance or sense of tradition.    
I think what we need to do is to pray for the conversion of sinners and those most in need of God's mercy.


  1. I'm not sure I get your point.

  2. Our children are in the crosshairs. May God and His Mother protect them and guide us, their parents, in raising up His children.

  3. There are days when the onslaught of immorality feels like a tidal wave. 20 years ago when I was raising my children to be decent, moral,upright citizens, it was a challenge.I home schooled-- so back in those pilgrim days ...we were considered...nuts. I pray for parents to have the graces necessary because to live counter culturally today, as Father Andrew Apostoli has said,... is a white martyrdom. I also pray for those growing up in broken homes without moral guidance because I've encountered many of them through the years...It breaks my heart. +

  4. I read the article that the woman linked to, about the designer babies. What kind of Frankenstein-Moloch world are we living in where that kind of crap is even legal? I think it can only be understood in biblical terms - such depravity defies logic.

    And about TV - at least the woman in the commercial had the decency to say "husband" and not "boyfriend" or something.

  5. Poor woman..

    She can move to Utah...we have our TV censored, the Cosmo magazine covers covered in the grocery store, the condoms you have to ask for at the pharmacy counter...people dress modestly and conservatively, no gays kissing in the park, and the public swimming pools aren't open onSunday--by the way--you can't wear a two piece swimsuit at most of the public can't get a decent drink in the state and you have to take out a second mortgage on your house to buy a carton of smokes...absolute Heaven..

    Then she'll enroll her kids in public school, and find out how the good church-going Mormons think about Catholics, and how her kids are practically spit upon, and how they will have no friends, and your neighbors won't talk to you...then her teen daughter says she's converting to the Mormon Church because that is the only way she can get a boyfriend...and she'll dream for the day when she can pack it all up and move back to Massachuetts...

    The grass is always greener isn't it...


  6. Sara, is it true that big beer companies make special beers just to comply with Utah state laws?

    She could always move to the South - though I can't say the pharmacies are any better.

  7. "you can't wear a two piece swimsuit at most of the public schools"

    I meant "public pools" but I think most of you guys figured that out :)


  8. Mercury--Yep we're the land of 3.2 Koolaid...although microbrews can have a bit more coolers are the same.

    Mixed drinks in a bar or restaurant can have equivalent of ONE shot of liquor in don't want to order a Long Island Ice Tea wouldn't recognize it.

    You can buy beer in grocery stores and convenience stores....anything else you have to go to package store. And the sin tax is terrible in this state.

    Interesting that our State Liquor Commission has all tee-totalers on the board..they wouldn't know the difference between a Corona and a Cosmo.


  9. "I'm not sure I get your point."

    "And he said to his disciples: It is impossible that scandals should not come. But woe to him through whom they come! It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck and he cast into the sea, than that he should scandalize one of these little ones."

    I think that is the point Thom,SFO

  10. A Random Friar6:42 PM

    Amazing how when Catholics propose laws or guidelines, it's "imposing morality."

    What is law, anyway? The budget battles, the Health Care Reform, the Jobs Bill... all are promoted in moral language, as a sort of categorical imperative that only the greedy or unfeeling would dare argue against.

    But, we've seen it before. We as a Church were born into that world. And when society comes to its sense, we will be there waiting again. Maranatha!

  11. Just say no.

    "We refuse to participate in your sin"

    When I pay my water bill at the city office, there are two young men that take the payment.

    One is a worker, the other a part-time worker, part time homosexual crusader.

    After being told "Take your queer campaign to a place out side of this government office, sit up, talk like a man, and take my money, or I will ask you be removed and an employee that doesn't parade their sex replace you"

    The city administration had to capitulate.

    "We will not participate in your sin" no way, no how, never.


  12. Chris in Maryland7:39 PM

    To take The Friar's point one more step, as Pope Leo XIII reminded us, "We're born for combat." (from his encyclical Sapientiae Christianae). He must've been reading Matt. 16:18.

    In Spiritual Warfare, the only defense is a good offense: Prayer, Fasting, Courage and Witness.

  13. Re; the Cosmo covers etc....I am relieved to be teaching my very young sons latin. Right now all those magazine covers seem to be talking an awful lot about the number six! (six=sex in latin)

    I get looked at like I am crazy when I go ahead of my children (boys and girl) to turn all those magazine covers around. Whatever. My job is to raise saints and I will be responsible for how I lacked in that department when I face our Lord.

    Society does not even recognize how far gone they are. I've only just realized it myself the last six years of my reversion. May God give me the grace necessary to raise the children He has loaned me!

  14. Just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get you...
    I must lead a sheltered life. Actually I don't. We visit the urban area where our kids live quite often. We go to parks, museums, the zoo, church, you name it, with our family members. We've never experienced any kind of an incident that keeps us from doing what we want. There is a lesbian couple with two children living next to our older son and his wife. They are nice people. I don't have to figure out their lives for them; that's between them and God. If you look for trouble you're always going to find it. I don't feel that raising kids with blinders on so they never see any part of life that's not rated G is the best way to prepare them for becoming adults.

  15. A child can never be completely shielded nor should they be. However, it is the parents job to ease that information to them in a gradual and non-traumatic way, so they may be taught appropriately. Particularly in a way that is AGE APPROPRIATE. Dousing them with "gasoline" is no lesson to teach a child, except trauma.

  16. I love Melody. Such common sense.

  17. Love you guys, too!

  18. Anonymous9:38 PM

    Notice the people who chime in are those who seek a license to sin. Fortunately, there are thousands of homeschooling families out there not taking Melody's advice. They are forming saints. It is all well and good that you selfish, single men who have never had any responsibility, other than feeding your own bellies and will never have families of your own to kick back, self-satisfied and tell us to let it all hang out.

    Dot's Mom

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  20. Here is someone with the correct attitude in dealing with heathens:


  21. Paul - I think sheltered children may be a luxury for the few. Generally most kids - especially in urban areas - seem to grow up more or less unsupervised.

    I never thought of St. John of the Cross regarding Michael Voris except for maybe some of the precautions St. John taught.

    I'm curious exactly what is it about Mark Shea that people do not like?

  22. "...I'm curious exactly what is it about Mark Shea that people do not like?..."

    "...I wonder how many people who are constantly griping about the evil American bishops and their monstrous plots to defeat Catholic teaching on the sanctity of human life will disengage from their lunatic conspiracy theorizing in comboxes long enough to answer this call?..." ************ From the latest post of Mark Shea.

    The concerns of the Faithful should not be belittled.

    Nothing warms the heart of a Grand Worshipful Master of the Synagogue of Satan more that the chirping of useful idiots about supposed conspiracy theories.

    It gives Satan more time to hatch more conspiracies against God and His Christ. Knowing he has point men pooh poohing the Faithful's attempts to point out problems is a source of great Pride for him.

    This is where complimenting someone is not false flattery; I have complimented Mr. Nelson's blog and have never regretted doing so.

    By his fruits we have come to know him.

    Mr.s Shea and Voris should eat of this fruit.

    To compare Mark Shea and Voris to Catholic Saints is sacrilegious.


  23. I like Mark Shea, and I find that while he is critical, he is more than fair to St. John of the Cross - I mean Michael Voris.

    And I don't think Melody is making excuses for sin. Not in the least. I understand what Paul is saying too, though, but I doubt Melody is denying that we need to protect kids' innocence and let their imaginations flower.

    It's a fine line sometimes, though.

  24. Terry, I can only guess that people don't like Mark Shea because he often writes with an attitude of final say. Sort of like, "I, The Great Mark Shea, have spoken. End of story." You get the impression that anyone who has a different perspective or understanding of something is not worthy to breath the air he breaths. That's just a guess.

  25. St Michael CTOD, You hit it on the head with this:

    "The concerns of the Faithful should not be belittled."

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  27. I love how self-righteous married types think that just because someone is single and SSA (but striving for chastity and fidelity) they are only concerned about themselves and not the formation of children to be good Catholics.
    Yeah, let's really start spreading that around. Cuz you know, single types have no *real* place in the authentic Catholic world of happy families.
    Thanks, Dots Mom.

  28. Saint Michael Come To Our Defense, I think you hit the nail on the head:

    "The concerns of the Faithful should not be belittled."

  29. Doughboy, you're right. Single people really don't have a place in the church, often. That's why I prefer anonymous Masses in urban parishes.

  30. Paul - I always appreciate what you have to say. I may not have the same problems with many bloggers others seem to have since I rarely read anyone in great depth any longer - especially if their posts are as long as mine sometimes can be. I skim and pause at points which resonate with me.

    And yet I blog? My life is a waste.

  31. There are some people that go to the edge of a cliff and appreciate the beauty that surrounds it, and the view of the sunset the cliff affords.

    Then there are those that jump off.

    "There is no place for single people in Church?"

    What the ????

    Single and same sex attracted?

    There is no such thing as married and same sex attracted?

    Man is sinful by nature; God has come to terms with that fact.

    What we are required to do is resist sin. At our best we avoid it, and please God in doing so.

    Doesn’t anyone think or say, quietly, at the least in a whisper:

    “Begone, Satan”

    whenever sinful thoughts enter their minds, or they get an itch they need scratched?

    “My Jesus, mercy!”


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  33. Doughboy and Thom,

    I didn't see the mother identifying her concerns/fears as specifically applying to CATHOLIC homosexuals, but rather just homosexuals. Don't take the criticism as personally directed at you if you are indeed SSA and trying to live an authentic Catholic faith. There's a difference.

  34. Mercury, yes, you're right, I'm not saying sin is okay. When I was a kid, I would ask my parents, "Mary or Johnny are allowed to (fill in the blank); why am I not allowed to, also?" My mom and dad would say, "Because Mary or Johnny's parents aren't raising you, we are!" I said the same thing to our kids, seemed to work pretty well.
    Probably half of our kids' friends came from broken or troubled homes. They spent a lot of time at our house. Kids actually like some structure.

  35. I just read this:

    ...and I thought back to this.

    How very stupid. How utterly, entirely stupid.

  36. Instead of making fun of the poor woman I'm sorry for her. She's had death threats. I don't go to city parks becuase it's dangerous. We have crack heads and heroin lovers getting high in the bushes and they have no problem killing you for ten dollars and yes, we have homosexuals having sex in the bushes,the archways, behind the trees, in the fountain and under the bridge. Interupting these people can lead to bodily harm. There are places you just can't go and as this woman found out you can't even complain about it out loud.

  37. Dymphna - you bring up a dirty little secret gay activists do not want people to believe still happens. Thanks for the reminder and support of Stacy's post - you placed it in another even more serious context. Reality bites.

    God bless you.

  38. Actually, my ex-husband was out cruising the parks and malls and even showed me which tree/shrub areas where the gays would get each other off. So I know it's true. The cops in Milwaukee were well aware of which parks this kind of activity was going on in. Terry is right, this is the dirty underbelly of the gay community. Because I know about this first hand (and from more experiences than just my ex), I don't buy most of the homosexual commentary about "we're just like everyone else, all squeaky clean" - even if I do know, of course, that's it's not the case for all of them. It's not fair to paint a picture with a wide brush, but it's also dishonest for many in the gay community to pretend this stuff doesn't go on.

  39. Chris in Maryland3:45 PM

    On the M. Shea and M. Voris topics, my sense is that Shea goads others and stirs up controversies (e.g., IF anyone does not join with Mark Shea in his obsession with the "water-boarding=torture" issue, Mark proclaims such are un-Catholic.), but Shea doesn't like the fact that Voris is putting light and/or heat [depending on your view point] on controversies within The Church.

  40. what charlotte said.

  41. Just an FYI: Stacy is a Catholic convert from the Baptist tradition. A former chemist, Stacy is now a stay at home mom pursuing a MA in Theology at Holy Apostle's College and Seminary.

    Read more here:

    I'm not sure the woman is all that stable herself.

  42. Terry -- Stacy has been married three times. She was pregnant each time she married. This is in her biography which is part of her blog, she freely admits to working in a strip club, having lovers and using drugs. Where does she get off criticizing gays and their behavior?

    I believe she decided to attack gays because she knew they would respond. And they did. There were over 900 comments to THAT blog. Several subsequent blogs referencing THAT blog also had over 100 comments. Before she wrote her attack blog she seems to have gotten only modest numbers. She wanted exposure and readers. She got them.

  43. Maureen - that's part of my thought in re-examining this. I think she might have a bigger moral dilema explaining her own life to her kids rather than worrying about a couple of women at the park with their toddler.

    My suggesting that she isn't all that stable herself is based on her own stated track record. I'm not judging her - just pointing out the facts.

    Thanks for your comment.

  44. +JMJ+

    Late to the party again. Paul has already deleted his comments. =(

  45. This was also posted to Stacy's blog.

    "Stand firm against these monsters. It is only a matter of time before Christians reclaim the courts and the government. Soon after we do, abominations like these perverted homosexuals will be put to death as God intends, not by mobs hanging them from trees, but by the courts and the nation.

    Christ will once again Rule the United States of America. The homosexuals and perverts will flee or die."

    I was a cradle gay Catholic. I stopped practicing my sexuality after 6 weeks in the early eighties because of concern about AIDS. I became alienated from my religion because the murderous hatred some Catholics have for gays was constantly expressed to me from a very early age and when I faced cancer in my twenties I found that being a part of the Church had destroyed my belief that I had a right to live.

    I left the Church when a letter from the CDF to the USCCB wrote that my silence was the only protection I should have from those with a murderous hatred of gays. I refuse to live behind a veil, but that is what my Church and that woman with a past, Stacy are demanding.

    I may not be sexually active, but I have to live in a gay ghetto because here I am not judged. I am not constantly reminded that I should be dating a woman, and I don't have my property vandalized because it's assumed that I am gay and sexually active, as happened to a single fifty something female single straight friend of mine.

    Like Stacy, I have a doctorate in the sciences, but I didn't, put myself through graduate school by exploiting my sexuality as she did. I taught calculus to undergraduates. I completed my doctorate while under treatment for testicular cancer. I even completed written exams the night before the worst operation most young men can contemplate.

    My troubles were not of my design; hers were. She is not qualified to be my judge, and she certainly has no right to be my jailer.

  46. “… I became alienated from my religion because the murderous hatred some Catholics have for gays was constantly expressed to me from a very early age and when I faced cancer in my twenties I found that being a part of the Church had destroyed my belief that I had a right to live…”

    What is innate, or inborn in human nature concerning homosexuality is a violent repugnance.

    To speak of homosexuality, or even just an inclination to it, as being innate in certain human beings, in order to make excuses for them, is to accuse God of contradiction, if not also to accuse Him of planting in men the cause of sin; this is implicit if not explicit blasphemy.

    Homosexuality is a vice, or sinful habit, created by nothing other than a series of sinful acts, for each of which the individual was responsible.

    Homosexuality is a moral problem.

    Repugnance for this sin has been placed in human hearts by God.

    When our Lord protected the unrighteous Mary Magdalene from the righteous Pharisees, he was protecting her repentance, not her sin.

    God will go to any lengths to help the sinner who is trying to get out of his sin, but He abominates the sinner that wallow sin it.

    Repugnance towards homosexuality is from God.

    For all men trying to work their way out of sin, God Himself helps.

    Those that choose to wallow should not expect the Faithful to cheer them on at a Gay Pride Parade anytime soon.

    We will not participate in your sinful behavior.



    Frank, she explains somewhere in there that that quote is false.

    She doesn't seem to be the kind of person to advocate death for sexual sinners, especially since she herself would admittedly be a hypocrite to do so.

  48. Pablo, did you even read what the guy said?

    He was talking about an attitude of hatred towards people, not towards sinful acts.

    And homosexuality, just like any other disordered inclination, can be with someone from birth. It's called original sin, it's called concupiscence, and it does not always result from personal sin.

    And what makes you so sure our Lord was protecting the Magdalene's repentance? She hadn't yet repented. I always thought the whole point of the story was to rebuke those whose righteous indignation makes them ready to stone other sinners when they themselves are just as worthy of death.

  49. Someone's existence is not sinful. Not even yours, Pablo, although it does seem to be one of bitterness and hate.

  50. Marco Sandolini ("St. Michael..."),
    You're a cowardly little SPPX fascist who threatens violence on the Internet hiding behind a saint's name. I can't be bothered to live down to your pornographic expectations.

    If you want to threaten violence, grow a pair and do it to my face.

    Otherwise, crawl back into your poor mother's basement.

    Frank W. Elliott, Jr.
    San Diego,CA

  51. 2 Corinthians chapter 5

    “…Pablo, did you even read what the guy said?

    He was talking about an attitude of hatred towards people, not towards sinful acts…”

    I read clearly what the statement meant.

    Original Sin refers to the sin of Adam and Eve,

    Baptism obliterates that sin completely.

    All other sins are acquired; either forced upon us or voluntary.

    Wishing my early demise in a dreadful manner makes no difference in my demise; should I die a horrible Death in terms of human expectations, my soul remains eternal.

    If I am in a state of grace upon my demise, I thank God and the Holy Mother.

    If I am not in a state of grace when I am to die, I ask our Mother to pray her Son allow me this final, if even undeserved grace.

    Those that despise me are the ones I walk to Calvary with; I beg God on their behalf that they be allowed His grace to enter Heaven, and that His Sacred Heart and the Immaculate Heart of His Mother replace their bitter hearts.

    Mr. Frank: Thank you for visiting my web site. I hope you stay in touch. Also, I am not a member of the SSPX.

    As we speak of Death, let us remember to say this prayer, as often as we can:

    O MOST MERCIFUL JESUS, Lover of souls I pray Thee, by the agony of Thy most Sacred Heart, and by the sorrows of Thine Immaculate Mother, cleanse in Thine Own Blood the sinners of the whole world who are now in their agony and who are to die this day. Amen.

    HEART OF JESUS, once in agony, have pity on the dying.


  52. "Original Sin refers to the sin of Adam and Eve,

    Baptism obliterates that sin completely."

    That is true, but Original Sin is also the source of disordered and sinful tendencies. We are a blank slate in terms of sin on our souls at Baptism, true, but Baptism does not obliterate sinful tendencies and sinful inclinations. The disordering of the passions is something we are born with, and something we will struggle our whole lives with.


Please comment with charity and avoid ad hominem attacks. I exercise the right to delete comments I find inappropriate. If you use your real name there is a better chance your comment will stay put.