Friday, May 03, 2019

Bad Catholic



I'm bad again.

Story of my life, I guess. 

I disagree with those who claim the Pope is a heretic, so I think that puts me far outside the conventional Catholic clique.  I watched EWTN last night and even Fr. Fessio has joined the protest and obviously supports the recent letter asking for an inquisition of Pope Francis.  (The letter details all the problems the signatories have with the Pope.)  EWTN is not my 'parish' nor my source for Catholic teaching, so that's fine.

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind being an outsider.

I have been an outsider since early childhood - beginning in Catholic school.  The fact my mother divorced and remarried to my dad posed some difficulties, and in hindsight I think this may have been the reason the sisters maybe treated me harshly, passed over me, and so on.  Likewise, the family situation was known to classmates who said my parents were going to hell and things like that.  It wasn't so bad however, since it moved me to prayer for my parent's salvation and instilled a spirit of penance in me as a young child.  Which made me weird. :)

As an adult I've lived with suspicion, misunderstanding, pretty much because of my 'singleness' and living arrangement.  Thus my fidelity to Catholic teaching has always been questioned by other devout Catholics.  It's fine.  I think it has led to a greater detachment and recognition of my need to avoid seeking affirmation and praise.  It also kept me from an active participation in church/parish  activities

I could detail all the stuff which puts me outside Catholic factions.  I'm a traditional Catholic but not Trad, for instance.  I think several Catholics on social media are extremists and self-promoters.  They engage in seemingly endless fights, viciously critical of one another if they happen to disagree or support the wrong person, and so on.  Negative labels are handed out to anyone who may oppose them.  It's good not to be part of that.  It is also the reason why I used to delete 'Friends' on my site - I pretty much did it before they could 'unfriend' me. 

Seriously, it's good to be an outsider.  My favorite saints were as well.  So there just may be a place for me with them in Heaven. 

One day Abba Daniel and Abba Ammoes went on a journey together. Abba Ammoes said, ‘When shall we, too, settle down, in a cell, Father?’ Abba Daniel replied, ‘Who shall separate us henceforth from God? God is in the cell, and, on the other hand, he is outside also.’ - Sayings of the Desert Fathers

16 comments:

  1. Like you, I've been an outsider in various ways. That's probably why your writing resonates with me. I'm not particularly attached to this pope and often scratch my head when it comes to trying to understand what he means but these blogs that act like they are the Magisterium - I avoid them! Most average Catholics don't even know about or read these blogs. I don't think these bloggers even connect with 10% of the average parish. Most people just go about their business and try to be good Christians...as it should be.

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  2. I think you are absolutely right Angela. The majority just want to do right and be in harmony with God and their neighbor.

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  3. Angela and Wallace - we think alike then. I don't feel so alone. Thanks.

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  4. In the past, the average Catholic not only would not know about individuals like the authors of these blogs, they also would likely know very little about the musings of the pope. I think a return to those days, when Catholics were not subject to (nor tempted or even expected to hang on) every utterance of the pope, would be most welcome and surely beneficial to the Faith.

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    1. I agree - or at least people have that perspective and not be so obsessed with Roman locutions. ;)

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  5. Terry - after having been accused of being everything from a Nazi, to a fundamentalist, to a liberal, to a traditionalist, to a conservative Catholic Franciscan on FB pages which are supposed to be Catholic and/or Franciscan, the only label I want for myself is "faithful Catholic Franciscan."

    I completely understand - everyone wants to put everyone else into a category, whether it is in the Church or as an American. I think it is very good of you to act as we who are Franciscan are called to do - to be faithful to the teaching of the Church, and to be obedient to the Pope, which is what I do my best to do every day. We do not have to like the Pope or love him, although it would make things easier. Nor do we have to agree that everything he says or does is wise, unless he is speaking ex cathedra. We just have to obey, and remember our duties as Catholics and what being a Catholic requires of us.

    It's not about personalities - it is about God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit!

    Be joyful, dear Terry, and blessed Easter! Warmest Franciscan blessings to you and all here - Susan, OFS

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  6. I forgot to add something else. Some years ago, I was confessing to a former pastor, who knew me very well. I, once again, had to accuse myself of having a big mouth, which is an ongoing problem with me (I know - shocking, isn't it?!)

    Father told me it is okay to have an opinion, and to speak up when I have something to say - just to always remember to be charitable.

    And then he reminded me of my birthday saints, Peter and Paul (who is also his name saint). He said they were continually saying the wrong thing to the wrong people, and generally putting their feet in their mouths on a regular basis - as well as often being knuckleheads (he put it much more respectfully than that, though!) And that both had grievously disappointed and betrayed Jesus at some point. Father told me that if God could make great saints of Peter and Paul, with all their shortcomings and baggage, think of what he could make of me!

    Which is excellent advice I have never forgotten, and which gives me hope that I am redeemable and loved by our good God! - Susan, OFS

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    1. Susan - why would you ever think you were not loved and redeemable?

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    2. I know God loves me and that I am redeemable. That's why I go to Confession - I know I disappoint God by my behavior, and I would never want to be distanced from my Father. The point I meant to make is that, as my former pastor advised me, if Saints Peter and Paul can be made into great saints, maybe He can do the same with me. God bless you!

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  7. Hi Terry,

    I have always been an outsider too but the Risen Lord has been very kind and merciful towards me by revealing that I have no where else to go but to him. Struggling and falling, I always end up with him.

    You are blessed as are all who find themselves "on the outside" but always at the foot of the Cross.

    God bless!

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  8. You think you're the outsider?

    This is what God the Father said to St. Catherine of Siena in the Dialogue:

    "When He returned to Me, rising to Heaven from the conversation of men at the Ascension, He left you this sweet key of obedience; for as you know He left His vicar, the Christ, on earth, whom you are all obliged to obey until death, and whoever is outside His obedience is in a state of damnation, as I have already told you in another place." Dialogue of St. Catherine of Siena

    I personally cannot believe the audacity of those who released the rant accusing the Pope of heresy on the Feast Day of St. Catherine. She would condemn their actions in a New York minute.

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  9. Hi, Terry:

    There is this excellent little essay on "wherepeteris": https://wherepeteris.com/the-remnant-it-is-not-what-youve-been-told/. I hope it makes you feel less alone. That blog and yours - and Henry Karlson over at Patheos, are beacons that I turn to from time to time.

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    1. Jimmy Akins from Catholic Answers did an excellent job dissecting the "Pope Francis is a heretic" letter as well. Mark Shea has the video on his blog.

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  10. Christopher Lake1:47 AM

    Terry, I've been reading, and being encouraged by, your blog for quite some time, but this is my first comment. God bless you, brother, for being an "outsider" Catholic who doesn't think that our current Vicar of Christ is a heretic! I'm an "outsider" too! :-)

    Are you familiar with the orthodox "pro-Pope Francis" Catholic website, "Where Peter Is"? If not, I think you will love it. (Full disclosure-- it was co-founded by a personal friend, but completely apart from that, it's simply a wonderful, thoughtful site where I believe you will find much encouragement.)

    Thank you so much for your witness. Your writing has helped me so many times. God bless you and keep you.

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