Tuesday, December 06, 2011

Axe Father.


A new feature.


Editor's note:  A new feature for the holidays is our "Axe Father" column - so without further ado - our guest poster, Father Axel...

Dear Father Axel,

Since Christmas falls on a Sunday this year, is our Sunday obligation covered by the Christmas Mass?  Or do we have to go to Mass twice?

Signed,

Jane

Father's response:

Jane, you ignorant slut, both obligations are met with any Christmas Mass you choose to attend, from the vigil to the last Mass on Christmas day, which is on a Sunday this year.

Bonus feature:  A word from Fr. Axel to anonymous:

If you have ever posted lewd pictures of yourself online, or wrote some nasty stuff - just remember, someday you're probably going to have kids or maybe even decide to run for office, or go for a big job someplace - and all that stuff just might pop up in an online  background check... for everyone to see. And read.

Likewise, if you have written a detailed confessional of your conversion on a blog or in a book - someday your kids will be in school and some kid might taunt them, "Your mom was a stoner!"  or  "Your dad is gay?"  Or worse. 

7 comments:

  1. I love this, you ignorant slut. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Snowed in the last couple of weeks?

    *

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear Father Axel,

    Y are kids laugh'n at me in my new school in Connecticut when I tell dem I have to go home and axe my parents for permission? Are they committing a sin?

    Signed
    Betty Lou Patterson

    PS: Is not axing for permission a Northern thing?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Dear Betty Lou,

    I don't know.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Fr.Axe word association9:01 PM

    "Ax[e]" vs "Ask"

    .... having experienced the Southern dialect as well as the Chicago ....

    "It is a sin that Teachers are not correcting ..." Fr. Axe

    Fox News and Black English - Ebonics - YouTube

    Pronunciation of "Ask," not "Ax" - Tip #2 - Garrard McClendon, Ph.D. - YouTube

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi Terry, it's Shadowlands back again. I started a new blog cos I missed everyone.

    I absolutely love Fr Axel. We need more priests with this kind of 'tell it like it is' (or one day might be if we're not careful to conceal our real activities) type of attitude.

    And he was right to call that girl a slut. She is so obviously ignorant of the rubrics, it's astonishing to me, a Vat 1 'referrerist'. The nuns who taught me would have ignored her question and simply slapped her across the face, hard.

    ReplyDelete
  7. LOL but I do worry bout some of my posts!

    ReplyDelete

Anonymous comments will no longer be accepted.
Please comment with charity and avoid ad hominem attacks. I exercise the right to delete comments I find inappropriate. Be sure and double check if your comment posted after you do the verification deal - sometimes it doesn't print if you made an error.