Before that "Duck Dynasty" Fool* there was St. Andrew the Fool ...

The first time I saw this photo

I thought it was of an Orthodox monk.

I pity the fool. - Mr. T

I don't have cable so I had no idea what Duck Dynasty was/is all about.

Besides, the only reality TV show I ever got into was "Third Rock From the Sun" which was mysteriously cancelled when people caught on that it was indeed a documentary/reality show - but I digress.

Now I know all about the brouhaha, and I just shrug.  Nothing new - except the loss of free speech I suppose - although something tells me this is about ratings. 

Anyway, long before Phil Robinson came along with that long beard and Duck Dynasty business, there was dear St. Andrew the Fool.  They talk alike, maybe look alike, but are separated by centuries...  But probably not class. 

St. Andrew the Fool.

The following dialogue consists of a chapter in the Life of Saint Andrew the Fool for Christ. It is a complex passage dealing with sensitive issues with unexpected twists and turns and paradoxes, as real life situations usually are, and for this reason it should be studied carefully, completely and within context. Saint Andrew was a holy man, specifically with the gift of being clairvoyant and a fool for Christ, who knew the secrets of men's hearts, and he spoke the truth as it was revealed to him and in the appropriate way for a particular moment. The story begins with Andrew sitting in front of the gate to his disciple Epiphanios' house.

As he sat on the ground in front of the gateway there came a young eunuch who was the chamberlain of one of the nobles. His face was like a rose, the skin of his body white as snow, he was well shaped, fair-haired, possessing an unusual softness, and smelling of musk from afar. As Epiphanios had been brought up together with him and was his friend they loved each other dearly.

Now this eunuch carried with him dates, about thirty in number. When he saw the naked body of the holy man he was alarmed and asked Epiphanios, "My dearest and beloved Epiphanios, who is this man and why does he go naked, although it is winter and unbearably cold, being like those who have been shipwrecked at sea?"

Epiphanios answered, "My dearest brother, I do not know what I shall say about his appearance, since his mind has been taken prisoner by the Evil One and he wanders about like one possessed and confused. All such people tear their clothes and run about without feeling anything." This he said because he did not want to reveal the holy man's virtue.

When the eunuch heard this he fell silent and, having pity on the blessed man as one of the poor, gave him all his dates. "Take these just for now," he said, "for I have nothing else with me."

But the holy man, who with the eyes of his spirit already knew the works of his soul, looked at him sternly and said, "Fools do not eat a gift of colophonia."

The eunuch, who did not understand what he said, replied, "You truly crazy man, when you see dates, do you think they are fruit from Colophon?"*

The blessed man said to him, "You deceiver, go into your master's bed-chamber and perform with him the sick practice of the sodomites, that he may give you other dates too. You wretch, you do not see the rays of the kingdom of heaven, who do not know the cruelty and bitterness of hell, do you not even feel shame before the angel who accompanies you as a Christian? What should be done with you, impure that you are, because you frequent the corners and do what should not be done, things which neither dogs nor swine, nor reptiles nor serpents do? You accursed fellow, why do you do this? Woe to your youth, which Satan has wounded and thrown down headlong into the terrible depth of hell and vehemence and boundless vigor! See that you do not go further, lest the Godhead treat you as you deserve, here burning you whole with flashes of lightning, there with the hell of fire."

When the eunuch heard this he trembled with fear, his face turned red like fire and his shame was great. - Please finish the story here. 

Ouchamagoucha!

Obviously St. Andrew wasn't as nice as Phil Robertson in how and what he said in his interview with GQ, still Mr. Robertson got a lot of flak from it.  That's news, I guess.  I have to say, I'm with Fr. Longenecker on this one: 

We don’t watch TV. I’ve never seen Duck Dynasty. I read about Phil Robertson’s statements in GQ and don’t see what all the fuss is about. He’s simply stated the historic Christian view. He might have used crude language, but he’s just being himself. You can’t be entertained by a hillbilly and then expect him to behave like an East Coast liberal. 

Besides, are people familiar with what homosexuals do with each other?  It seems strange to me in this sexually liberated age that people are so coy about the actual facts of gay sex. 

We’re talking about anal intercourse between two men, oral sex, oral-anal sex, an obsession with the penis and anus and other stuff which is too disgusting to discuss.  If gay sex is so wonderful why are otherwise sexually liberated people so prissy and Puritanical about it–blaming Mr Robertson for being vulgar? He was only talking bluntly about what actually goes on between two men and saying he found it disagreeable. - Source

Follow-up on St Andrew the Fool...

When asked why he reprimanded the young courtesan, the Saint explained:

[After they finished their feast Epiphanios said to the blessed man, "Venerable sir, why did you rebuke my friend so bluntly?"]

The blessed man answered, "Because he is dear to you and beloved, for this reason I did give to him this lecture, for had he not been your friend, he would not heard a single word from me. This is not my vocation, to rebuke sinners, but to run the straight road which leads to a better life."

The Saint then went on to explain to Epiphanios, who, as a defense, tried to explain the courtesan's untenable predicament as a slave:

[Epiphanios said, "If a master enjoins a slave to minister to his needs, be they physical, or spiritual, or sinful, and the slave fails to obey, you surely know, my Lord, how much he will suffer, being maltreated, beaten, threatened and receiving all sorts of punishments."]

The holy man answered, "This, my son, is the martyrdom of Jesus Christ at which he hinted when he said: 'Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.' Thus if the slaves do not bow to the abominable sodomitic passion of their masters they are blessed and thrice blessed, for thanks to the torments you mention they will be reckoned with the martyrs." - Mystagogy

It is what the Church teaches.  Let's try not to be so sensitive.


* Please don't be offended - I mean that in the best sense of the word - fool for Christ.

Self portrait as St. Andrew the Fool.

Naked without virtues

bridges burned

my sins my

only

possessions.

 

St. Alexis, l'homme de Dieu

Saint Alexis mort chez ses parents.

Vie de saints. Maître de Fauvel. XIVe.

St. Alexis and St. Benedict Joseph Labre are my very special patrons.  July 17 is the feast of St. Alexis - the saint who couldn't be married - ending his hidden life as a pilgrim, a mendicant - a beggar, living unrecognized beneath the staircase of his family home until after his death.  Something was off with these two guys - Alexis, and later, Benedict Joseph.  They give me hope.

Last evening I celebrated the feast of Mt. Carmel, joining a group of Carmelite friars and what seemed to me to be a full church of Secular Carmelites.  It was a wonderful grace.  I was astonished at how many people were there, including the six friars, three of whom are priests.  I felt like I had been on a long journey and returned to find the Church renewed by Carmelites.  So many holy people were there - it was a grace to worship with them.

The following is a short story about St. Alexis - he spent part of his life in Syria, so perhaps he will pray for the poor people of that country, so torn apart by civil war - especially the Christians, whose survival is very much threatened.

Story of St. Alexis.

St. Alexius the only son of Euphemianus, a wealthy Christian Roman of the senatorial class, fled his arranged marriage to follow his mysterious holy vocation. Disguised as a beggar, he lived near Edessa in Syria, accepting alms even from his own household slaves, who had been sent to look for him but did not recognize him, until a miraculous vision of the Blessed Virgin Mary singled him out as a "Man of God." Fleeing the resultant notoriety, he returned to Rome, so changed that his parents did not recognize him, but as good Christians took him in and sheltered him for seventeen years, which he spent in a dark cubbyhole beneath the stairs, praying and teaching catechism to children. After his death, his family found writings on his body which told them who he was and how he had lived his life of penance from the day of his wedding, for the love of God. (Source)

Scenes from the Life of St. Alexis

St. Mary of Egypt, penitent...

Hold the applause, please.

Today is the day I have been accustomed to commemorate St. Mary of Egypt, yet depending on where you are in the Catholic world, her feast is observed on the 5th Sunday of Easter, or April 1, 2, or 3.  It doesn't matter to me - I think of her today.

Mary of Egypt is a good patron for many modern day sinners like myself who have been given over to hedonistic excess at one time or another - looking for love in all the wrong places, and so on.  A prostitute, she went on pilgrimage to Jerusalem and made her services available on the way - sort of like adding an advertising app to her blog on which she promotes her conversion.  The lady just wanted to be loved, don't we all.  (Actually, she would often 'do it' for free, as she liked the sex.)

At the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, Mary the Egyptian experienced a stunning conversion and fled into the desert to do penance.  She lived in solitude and silence, and chose not to keep a conversion diary, so we have little to go on as far as her life of penance goes.  Giving up her means of making a living and not cashing in on her conversion story proved costly - thus she went about the desert precincts naked, for decades, barely recognizable as woman or man, accepting the abundance of what little the desert had to offer... 

Approximately one year before her death, she recounted her life to St. Zosimas of Palestine who encountered her in the desert. When he unexpectedly met her in the desert, she was completely naked and almost unrecognizable as human. She asked Zosimas to toss her his mantle to cover herself with, and then she narrated her life's story to him, manifesting marvellous clairvoyance. She asked him to meet her at the banks of the Jordan on Holy Thursday of the following year, and bring her Holy Communion. When he fulfilled her wish, she crossed the river to get to him by walking on the surface of the water and received Holy Communion, telling him to meet her again in the desert the following Lent. The next year, Zosimas travelled to the same spot where he first met her, some twenty day's journey from his monastery, and found her lying there dead. According to an inscription written in the sand next to her head, she had died on the very night he had given her Communion and had been somehow miraculously transported to the place he found her, and her body preserved incorrupt. He buried her body with the assistance of a passing lion. On returning to the monastery he related her life story to the brethren, and it was preserved among them as oral tradition until it was written down by St. Sophronius. - Sorry, I took this from WIKI, although it is fairly accurate.

Conversions can be instantaneous, but they are ordinarily, only the beginning of a long process of purification.  Interestingly, when Our Lady instructed the penitent to go yonder across the Jordan into the desert, she said, "There you will find peace."  She never said happiness.  Today everyone seems to look for happiness and witnesses to their 'courage'.  Yet only true happiness can be had in heaven... at least that was what the Catholic Church taught when I was little.  As we once memorized from the Baltimore Catechism:

Question: Why did God make you?

Answer: God made me to know Him, to love Him, and to serve Him in this world, and to be happy with Him forever in the next.

Today however, the prosperity gospel seems to have influenced American Catholics, who freely promote and sell their conversion stories.  Some, like Fr. Corapi, fail to understand that conversion is only the beginning of a long process... 'as long and as hard as life itself'.  (Angela of Foligno)