Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Gangs of Poodles terrorize South Beach residents.



Homeless poodles have been found wandering exclusive neighborhoods in American cities due to the recession - owners just cannot keep up with the popular but high maintenance pet - bi-weekly grooming/clipping/pedicures, special diets, clothing, boots, jewel encrusted leashes and tiaras.  "Poodles are not only demanding but they are expensive," chirped ChaCha Raimundo, "we are in foreclosure on our condo, we're stretched beyond our means!"
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This last holiday weekend, poodles seemed to be turning on their cash-strapped owners who had abandoned them on the beaches.  In a very scary situation in South Beach on Memorial Day weekend, there was an actual poodle stampede; poodles snatched purses and jewelry from unsuspecting tourists and the bar-hopping crowds, defecating on beach chairs, pulling off thongs and flip-flops while biting people's ankles.  Witnesses said it was mayhem.  Authorities are investigating and animal rights groups are demanding compensation for the abandoned pets as well as government funded health care. 

9 comments:

  1. [Jack is angry with Karen]

    Karen: Hi, poodle.

    Jack: Mm. How are you?

    [to Grace]
    Jack: Hi, Grace. Who's your daddy?

    Grace: [confused] His name is Martin Adler.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is a direct result of President Obama's crackdown on illegal drugs.

    Poodles that once worked at the drug trade are now unemployed, and have to do unimaginable things just to maintain the standard of living to which they had become accustomed.

    Stop illegal drug unemployment. Put a Poodle to work.

    Vote Republican.

    *

    ReplyDelete
  3. The little beasts have turned bad all right!


    arrrgh

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous7:10 PM

    This is a joke, right? Right????

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous10:37 AM

    Maybe these guys were a bad influence:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYuIYNaKynI



    Vickie

    ReplyDelete
  6. Aceman10:40 AM

    My guess are these poodles are gay too. Jewel encrusted leashes and tiaras? Ace

    ReplyDelete
  7. "True that", Aceman

    ReplyDelete


Please comment with charity and avoid ad hominem attacks. I exercise the right to delete comments I find inappropriate. If you use your real name there is a better chance your comment will stay put.